Category: Religion

Past, Present, and Future

Read if you will. Or just accept my wishes that you have had a good holiday season, and for a happy, healthy new year!

This contemplative message comes to you as we transition from religious and national holidays of the season to celebrating the beginning of a new year. I am unsure of its edifying value. Mostly I muse and wander, skirting around feelings that have emerged as another post-Pam holiday season approached. Read if you will. Or just accept my wishes that you have had a good holiday season, and for a happy, healthy new year!

Past
Present
Future
Living in the Past, Present, and Future

Past

Youth have no past of their own. Few, if any, memories to dwell on. They learn of their past from those within their circles. Family, family friends, school, religious affiliations. Youth develop a past as they age. They typically become aware in their teens. And while learning their past, they start to question. Some learn life’s lessons early through both happy and tragic experiences.

Adults carry their past with them as they bound along life’s highways and byways. All the while adding to the volume and depth of past experiences. The past molds their outlook on life. It impacts their decisions. It is integral to their thought processes. Their past is both a blessing and a curse.

Later in life our early past often lies latent. Only surfacing when reminded. More recent past begins to emerge as repeat experiences. Sometimes melding and becoming confused as intermingling fibers of new and well-worn clothing. The past continues to guide us. And yet we have forgotten so much!

The past is both a teacher and a burden to the aged. Wisdom comes from how we reconcile the past. Yet its weight is always upon us as we navigate what’s left of our lives.

Back to the Top

Present

We live in the present. Or do we? We meet each day anew. Yesterday is in the past. Tomorrow is unknown.

Youth experience each day with little expectation. Their limited past is of little help for the day. They rely on their wits and those whom they accept as having wisdom enough to guide them. Parents, siblings, peers. At the end of the day, they have added good and/or ill experiences to their past. Youth have yet to deeply contemplate the future.

Adults navigate life’s trials and tribulations. Relationships, work, family, social interactions. Though somewhat guided by the past, they are enough to fill the day. The past can straighten life’s paths or obscure roads from vision. The past can lift up or bring down. It does both from time to time. Each day’s decisions are based on past experience and hopes and dreams of the future.

The past envelops us as a binding or a blanket as it becomes the greater part of our life span. More of the day is spent remembering. We can be suffocated by it. We can embrace it. But we can’t escape it. Days are filled with memories. We remember past hopes and dreams for the future. We are on a destiny train to the future.

Back to the Top

Future

Youth do not understand the future. They have no experience to lead them on. Their concept of the future is forever. Their view of the future is couched in their learned past. They start to look to the future as they gather past experience. They develop a concept of what life will bring.

Adults look to the future from instinct. The drive to survive presses notions of sustenance, shelter, procreation. Adults develop plans. Some detail their every move while others press on with vague notions of direction. Aspirations. Hopes. Goals. Wishes. All are looking to the future.

Aging changes future perspective. The future is shorter. It is finite. Aspirations, hopes, goals, and wishes are either fulfilled or lost in the past. The future looks more toward legacy. What will be left behind to lend wisdom to others’ pasts? There is both fulfillment and emptiness as we contemplate Days of Future Past 1.

Back to the Top

Living in the Past, Present, and Future

Personally, this year’s season is a true mixture of the past, present, and future. I am aware of the weight and the wisdom of my past. Memories of holidays from my youth and adulthood mingle with my recent past. They include loved ones who are either gone or far away. We can no longer celebrate as once we did. Decorations, cards, and gifts now recall those memories. Memories of what was and is no more.

At the same time I feel excitement and contentment for what is now my life. New love, new friends, new surroundings add to the joy of being closer to family. Each day is new unto itself. Retirement affords me to choose to do, or not do, the daily tasks before me – within reason. I am thankful for the day.

As in the past, my present hope for your future is a happy, healthy new year!

Past
Present
Future
Living in the Past, Present, and Future

Back to the Top

  1. Album by the Moody Blues ↩︎

More Musings…

Word of the Week – Confabulate
Music – The Other Non-addictive, Mood-altering, Non-substance

Word of the Week – Confabulate

Let me first say that I tried to guess the meaning of confabulate before looking it up. I thought it meant something along the lines of blowing something way out of proportion. I thought my definition was a stretch. The “con” part seemed contradictory to making more out of something. But I took a shot. I wasn’t close!

According to Merriam Webster, confabulate is “to exchange viewpoints or seek advice for the purpose of finding a solution to a problem.” Synonyms include consult, confer, discuss, talk. It’s so common it seems we do it all the time!

Some confabulation is short. Like attempts to bring someone’s words to the surface – like an emotional response. Other confabulations, it seems, try to help develop a theme or a plot, or even a memory.

I can relate to confabulation with my age peers. Like me, they are having difficulty with recall of names, places, and people. We laugh at the effort it takes two or more people to remember any particular thing. We laugh to mask the fear that we are no longer at the top of our game. The reality of the effects of aging.

We often confabulate about where to go or what to eat. We confabulate to figure out how to deal with the weather. I am particularly honored when I get a text or a call from a friend or relative asking for my opinion or to help work through a difficult decision.

But I think I’m making light of the term. Webster’s explains the use of confabulate in much more serious context. Go there to find in-depth understanding. I just like the word as either a verb (confabulate) or a noun (confabulation). And thus ends the discourse on The Word of the Week.

Music – The Other Non-Addictive, Mood-altering, Non-substance

This image arrived in my text threads this week:

I take issue with the first descriptor in the above list. I believe I am addicted to music! Not just making it. Also listening. Music is so ingrained in me. Typically, I am silently (or not so silently) humming or singing a tune in my head. I wonder how I would get along without music!

Lyrics constantly pop into my head as I am listening and talking with others. Sometimes they are completely out of context. The topic of the song and our discussion are not close to the same. I blare out the lyrics in tune. Often they become a play on words. This also leads to research and confabulation to figure out the title and/or artist.

Music is definitely mood-altering. Again I say, “I wonder how I would get along without” it! Religious music had an early influence on my life. That influence changed with the works of Bob Dylan. The Beatles, Simon and Garfunkel, The Moody Blues, and many more also shaped it. It is often the music of my teens and twenties that come to mind in any given situation. Music of the 80’s and 90’s bounce around in my brain. Though I am less influenced by their genres.

Where would I be without my music?! I wrote my earliest, simplistic song while still in high school. I’ve written for and about women. I’ve written about family and friends. I’ve written about dreams and real experiences. Writing and playing my lyrical and/or instrumental music is cathartic! Music has seen me through some of my most difficult times. Aided my recovery. Given me purpose. It is a non-drug medicine!

Common side effects include but are not limited to uncontrolled head bobbing, toe tapping, finger snapping, selective hearing impairment and persistent melody flashbacks

I may have already covered “persistent melody flashbacks.” The rest is soooooo true! You know it is. Sing along. Even out of tune. Out of range. Out of time. You know you do it. It can’t be helped. Music is likely the most potent, readily available panacea for emotional injury. It requires no prescription. You need no insurance. If you are like me, you might not even need a fix. It’s just there!

I’ve done my share of drugs, drunk my share of spirits. Now I do yoga from time to time. I exercise often. Music may be addictive, mood-altering, and sometimes without physical form. But it is clearly one of the most valuable manifestations of human endeavors. If by some chance you are not hooked, I urge you to listen. Take it in. Let it flow through your veins. I doubt you will be disappointed. It may help you heal.

Word of the Week – Confabulate
Music – The Other Non-addictive, Mood-altering, Non-substance

Crunch Time 2024

I have heard that some staunchly conservative churches, or at least their pastors, describe the choice for “Christian” voters as between the lesser of two evils. That the choice is policy over personality. Important policies like a total ban on abortion influence “real” Christians. Inclusive sexual orientation also influences them. These issues drive them to vote for the lesser of two “ungodly” persons for our next president.

Granted, I am not a religious person. But I have been around the block a few times when it comes to deities, dogmas, liturgies, and interpretations. Based on everything I have heard and seen during this election cycle, here’s my interpretation of their message:

I’ve tried really hard to keep my political opinions to myself. I share them only with those who most likely agree with me. They believe, as I do, that the former president is an existential threat. This threat is not only to our democracy but also to our very freedom. In some cases, potentially, our lives!

It is more evil to vote for a person who embraces individual freedoms. This includes how we take care of our bodies and who we can love and marry. It is even worse than voting for someone who is a proven habitual liar, philanderer, and thief – at best! One who not only blows with whichever wind will keep his ego inflated, but demands loyalty as to a god!

This perspective irks me in several ways. It assumes that true Christians support a total ban on abortion. It also assumes their narrow definition of relations between consenting adults. They say “The Bible clearly says.” But, several major Protestant Christian denominations support a woman’s right to choose. These denominations also recognize the science of gender variance.

The Bible clearly states many things (tongue in cheek). The interpretation of its statements are as varied as the people who wrote the words and all who read them. Many books have been written to parse the meaning of words, phrases, and entire sections of the Bible. Authors strive to decipher verses, chapters, and whole books. Many claim to know or to have been shown by God, the correct meaning of God’s biblical message. Thus, making them right and everybody else wrong. I also fear for those who sit before the pulpit. They believe they are hearing the Word of God. As a result, they vote based on the narrow interpretations of their church leaders.

Some say our nation was founded on tenets and beliefs of Christianity. Others believe that those who came fled religious and economic persecution. I haven’t read the entire constitution for a long time. But from what I remember, this country was built on the concept of freedom of speech and religion. It is a country where anyone willing to abide by basic social rules can live and work for a livelihood. These rules are loosely based, I think, on the Ten Commandments. This is regardless of race, religion, ethnicity or country of origin.

Have we attained a panacea? Have our leaders always done what is right? Have our citizens always chosen well who will govern? Nope. Not even close. Does that mean that our democracy is wrong? Should we discard it? So many have fought and died for democracy. Should we allow a person or power brokers to abolish it? Please say no! ( Can I get an Amen? 😉 )

I am writing this uncharacteristic post because I am afraid for our freedom. I am afraid that some people don’t see the danger. One candidate stated outright that he will reign as a dictator. Sure, he is doing things some want for now, but he will eventually dictate everything even to them. Whether we be Jews, Hispanics, Muslims, Blacks, Straight, or Gay, we all will lose! Eventually, anyone who disagrees with those in power will also lose! Bottom line – the man for whom some will vote to save them from what they perceive as the evil conduct of pagan heathen, will bring an evil. This evil is something our world has seen before. We had to fight against it and lost millions of lives to overcome it.

Sadly, these words will have no impact on the outcome of Tuesday’s election. Both sides realize that few minds are changed with political rhetoric. But if you think that what I am writing is worth sharing, please do so. Either copy and paste, or share the link to this page. I am Keith A Jaben. I am Keith Javia. I am the author of wutjavia.com. I am finally speaking out.

“Real Men Love Babies”

So says a billboard somewhere on the back highways of Alabama.

Its intended purpose is to persuade men to vote against women’s right to choose, against any abortion. It is indicative of a Southern religious mentality that pits the right wing, freedom from government control of their lives groups, against other’s views of freedom being about letting people make their own personal decisions.

Our society is based on a set of laws that is meant to ensure that all persons are treated equally, that we steer clear of laws that limit government control while providing for the safety and welfare of everyone within our borders.

“Hang on, hang on, hang on.” So said Eric Clapton during an Unplugged performance of Alberta on M-TV many years ago. I recognize that I am in no way knowledgeable enough nor qualified to write about this subject. I can only try to communicate how I feel and how such expressions, i.e. billboards, affect and affront me.

I am pro-life AND pro-choice. Of course I/we want people to have children. It is not only wonderful, but innate for our survival as a species. But I cannot fathom being forced to carry something growing in me that I neither meant to cause nor want! If it were men who had to carry a fetus in the womb, I think they’d be singing a different song.

But what I simply cannot understand is how the very people who want less government control of their property, their money, their “freedoms” are the same people who want to control others’ bodies and thoughts because a god, or any other socio-religious entity says it’s the only true and right way! The same people who truly believe that some humans are more human than others, or less so, think that the only sustainable race profile is white, Christian!

As I read what I am writing I know that I have now gone off the diving board into the deep end of opinion at the risk of upsetting those I have tried so hard not to. All in hopes that you “like” what you read. I feel bad if that’s how you feel. I respect it. I understand if you think you must divorce yourself from this blog. But I do not apologize!

Maybe next week I’ll get back to the wading pool with warm fuzzy topics like travel or music, family and friends. But not today. Today I am taking a stand (or a dive, not to mix metaphors)!

Chivalry

As in the Age of Chivalry, whether in love or war, respect, compassion, and politeness are honorable traits we all could benefit from now.

“Chivalry is/isn’t dead.” I’ve thought about these cliches many times throughout my life when opening doors, especially for women, letting people in line at the checkout or passing lane, or responding with respect to people in authority, those older than I (I know, they are getting harder to find), and, actually, people in general. But also when reacting to those who do the opposite or fail to be respectful of others.

My regular readers recognize that I often quote Webster’s Dictionary when defining words I include in my posts:

as in gallantry

speech or behavior that is honorable and polite

Gentlemen who were lucky enough to gain invites to the state dinner are expected to act with the finest chivalry.

In an act of rare chivalry, the driver allowed several cars stopped at a “yield” sign to go ahead

I was reminded when I looked up chivalry on Google that its origins are quite different:

the medieval knightly system with its religious, moral, and social code.

  • HISTORICAL knights, noblemen, and horsemen collectively. “I fought against the cream of French chivalry”
  • the combination of qualities expected of an ideal knight, especially courage, honor, courtesy, justice, and a readiness to help the weak.

Cambridge Dictionary has it this way:

very polite, honest, and kind behavior, especially by men toward women.

the system of behavior followed by knights in the medieval period of history, that put a high value on honor, kindness, and courage: the age of chivalry.

I was talking with a friend the other night who recently lost her husband rather abruptly after a short illness. She was talking about how her late husband took care of the lawn, bushes, and household maintenance and that she would have to learn to be more independently “handy” now. I immediately thought of chivalry. Here’s how she described him:

[His] love language was service – always making sure everything was working correctly, fixing and making improvements for his family and our renters. I know from experience that not all men have this quality. But he certainly did.

Many of you who read this understand that, right or wrong, we were brought up this way. In fact, we are probably the last generation to embrace a chivalrous philosophy. It’s not even a conscious attitude, although sometimes I worry that those for whom I am opening a door might think it a misogynistic act.

Things began to change during our formative years in the ’60’s and ’70’s. Women’s liberation and free – almost everything – began reshaping social norms. Don’t get me wrong. I am completely on board with love and equality for everyone. But I contend that chivalry should NOT be dead! Rather, it should also be equal for men and women. Its actions are out of respect, honor, and politeness regardless of its origins and changes in social norms.

Personally, I am proud when I act chivalrously. Once again I go back to my basic rule – treat others the way you want to be treated. As in the Age of Chivalry, whether in love or war, respect, compassion, and politeness are honorable traits we all could benefit from now.

May it be so!

P.S. As I was opening the outer door to the building vestibule with a cart full of boxes and totes from my previous house. I noticed two girls, maybe 10 or 11, in the main building hallway. One looked over at me. Upon opening the inner door, she came toward me and asked if she could hold the door for me.

Maybe it is so!

I Still Believe

My new normal includes revisiting experiences and learnings from my past. My dad would be happy to know that, contrary to how it seemed in my youth, I learned the value of taking care of what is entrusted to me, be it material or ethereal. He taught me about organization and planning, and again, though I rarely exhibited it, follow-through. As I navigate a plethora of changes, those traits help me. Especially as I age and my brain works, let’s just say, differently.

Following through on a daily basis is important. But there are more consequential concepts engrained in my psyche. I, as many who read this, am a product of growing up in the 1960’s and 1970’s. From the latter days of the beat generation (Beatniks) through the Hippie movement that included tuning in and dropping out, drugs, burn the bra, protest the war, and freedom to love whomever we choose.

Through my formative years I learned what I still consider to be the most powerful tenet of living in community with others; do unto others as you would have them do unto you. I know. This isn’t the first time I’ve broached this subject. But I still believe. I believe that being kind is better than being mean. Recognizing what is common in our humanity outweighs our differences in religion and politics. Helping is better than ignoring. You get the picture.

While the saying is basically biblical, living life loving and cherishing those whom you know and those you don’t does not require religion or even belief in a deity. Sure, we can glean valuable instruction about living from them. But the truth is that religions, just like the people who adhere to them, are both good and bad by nature. We must choose individually how we want to behave.

The longer I live, and the more I learn about myself and my likeness to every other person on earth, the more I want to choose kindness and inclusion. Sometimes this takes proactive effort when those I encounter are so different from me in both looks and ways of living. Dare I quote another biblical reference, “Judge not lest you be judged.” Again, regardless of its origin, it rings true.

And while I’m preaching (pun intended), love transcends people to every living thing, the physical world, and the universe as a whole. As a youth I would often step on or otherwise kill bugs, birds, and other small animals mostly just for fun, sometimes for the hunt. Now I choose to let living things live – unless they are invading my personal space or, I am sure, if I need them for food. I am not a pure pacifist. I believe in protecting oneself and community. I am no longer inclined to destroy anything just because. Still, I am not guiltless in my efforts.

So many times it’s the little things; a smile, “hello”, a wave. Not all actions need be monumental nor monetary. Though we should endeavor to positively impact our world through effort and donations. Lift up those around us and around the world rather than tear down. We all benefit by doing so. It feels good. It feels right.

I’ll quote another biblical passage, “This, too, is vanity.” We are such tiny specks in the grand universe. What does it matter what we do? Probably not much considering our position in the whole. Yet I think it is worth while, and true to self, to positively affect the world around us. The alternative just doesn’t seem to make sense. Not to me anyway.

I choose to believe.